Why Cat Day

 

 I was just another passive domestic pet horsing around with a fuzzy fake grey mouse (to jolly the warden) pretending I was stupid enough to believe it was real.  Suddenly I caught sight of myself in a mirror going through this humiliating performance, and it hit me that us cats don’t really count for diddly in this dog-oriented culture.

 

In a flash I decided I’m not gonna play that game any more.  Because, see, lying around on the carpet all day, waiting for somebody to come home to chuck me under the chin, was not my top career choice. If I’d had a choice, I’d have picked something so the world would know me for the fabulous, fantastic feline I am.

 

But life’s a tough buck.  You’re supposed to shut up and play the hand you’re dealt.  Which, if I did, I’d be left with a split personality.

 

Because, on the one hand, us cats are supposed to love you, our pseudo-parental owners, but on the other hand, to you we’re mostly just furry objects to be fed. And sometimes petted, essentially as surrogates for the beloved teddy bears of your long-lost childhood. Otherwise we’re like wallpaper, in the room, but overlooked. 

 

Which, in a moment of sheer cerebral legerdemain (destined to go down as perhaps the most iconic moment in feline history) I decided to fix.

 

My initial insight, (hand of God?) which came out of some unknowable place like a bolt from the blue, was to look at a 12-month calendar. And when I did, a voice inside me snarled, “What’s missing, pussycat?”

 

Because, I saw special holidays to honour mothers, fathers, grandparents, secretaries, bosses (bosses?), historical heads of state, military leaders, trees, veterans, labour, cities, countries, wars, ends of wars, the first day of May, explorers, and (a real biggie in the Colonies!) National Tap Dance day.  There is also a day set aside for fools!  And (this drives a stake through my heart) National Pet Week!  But nothing for Cats.  Rien! Nada.  Zero.  Zilch.  Does this tee me off?  Take a guess.

 

That’s when the concept for a special day to celebrate felis domesticus sent up a dazzling fireworks extravaganza in my soul!

 

POW! POW! POW! PUSSYCATS RULE!

 

I chose August the 15th, for two reasons: (1) it’s in the middle of the disgusting “Dog Days” of summer – (2) it’s in a month that isn’t clogged with special holidays. Is this a perfect day for “Cat Day,” or what?

 

I’m already too busy planning the third annual Cat Day celebration for August 15th, 2006 to write more, so if you want to find out more about this holiday to honour pet royalty, find my book HAPPY CAT DAY: A MANIFESTO FOR AN OFFICIAL CAT HOLIDAY, and/or log on to my site www.happycatday.org.

 

Meanwhile, here are some peppy cheers to use at the cat day parade I hope you’ll organize on August 15th to rouse the rabble:

 

CAT DAY!  CAT DAY!

DON’T BE A WUSS!

TAKE TWENTY FOUR HOURS

TO PAMPER YOUR PUSS!

 

YOU WANNA KEEP A KITTY?

YOU WANNA MAKE ‘EM PURR?

YOU GOTTA HONOUR CATS

WITH A HOLIDAY FOR SURE!

 

CAT DAY!  CAT DAY!

GIVE IT TO ‘EM SOONER!

RUB THEIR BELLIES

AND BREAK OUT THE TUNA

 

FELINE DIGNITY

GET A LOAD OF THAT

TIME TO CELEBRATE

THE GLORY OF THE CAT!

 

CAT DAY! CAT DAY!

GIVE IT TO ‘EM NOW!

CAT DAY! CAT DAY!

MEOW! MEOW! MEOW!

 

CAT DAY!  CAT DAY

LOVE YOUR PET

CATS DESERVE

ALL THE STROKES THEY CAN GET!

 

YOUR CAT IS YOUR FRIEND

NOT JUST A FURRY BEAST

TIME TO TREAT CATS

WITH THEIR OWN SPECIAL FEAST!

 

 

Love – and Happy Cat Day,

 

Tiger 

 

Taken from 'Happy Cat Day' A manifesto for an official Cat Holiday written by Tiger Hample

(A bold, visionary feline)

 

Illustrated by Stu Hample (none of those)