Things had been quiet in the house for a while and all was dark when I crept up the stairs from the basement. I reached the main floor and looked carefully around but saw nobody.

I could hear snoring from the second storey bedroom which further confirmed that at least one of the people of the house was asleep.

Relieved, I moved slowly, quietly into the living room, glancing up the open stairway as I went to make sure nobody was there to see me. All clear and I could now hear the steady breathing of both of them as they slept. Excellent!

I looked around the living room, hoping to find something of value but saw nothing to my liking. A few books on the centre table, a couple of remotes for the TV and DVD player, a set of coasters and a vase with a bouquet of flowers. Useless.

I moved onwards into the dining room and examined the various articles on the table. A couple of novels, an ashtray, empty, a napkin holder/salt and pepper shaker set, two pens and a pad of paper and a guitar pick. Boring!!!

I stealthily made my way to the kitchen, quite pleased that I could see as clearly as I did in the dark. I scanned the kitchen counters for anything of interest, perhaps something to eat. There were a couple of empty port glasses along with a bottle, also empty and a bowl half-full of pistachio shells. I poked through the shells a little, hoping to find a stray nut someone might have missed but no luck. A quick peek into the sink confirmed that it was empty, no dishes with possible leftovers.

Past the kitchen I went into the laundry room and exited just as quickly. I definitely wouldn't find anything worth my while in there. I moved on into the powder room and pulled open the door of the tiny storage closet. 'These people should change the magnet on this door,' I laughed to myself. 'It certainly doesn't keep the door shut very well.' Nothing amazing in there either unless one was real fond of toilet paper or Comet!

Disappointed, I returned to the kitchen and suddenly noticed something I had missed on my first go-around. Right there on the lunch counter was a disposable cigarette lighter. 'This can certainly be handy,' I thought. I reached for it but miscalculated and the lighter fell to the floor with a clattering sound. I scurried to it in haste but only managed to slap it across the floor and create more noise.

"What's going on?!" I heard the man upstairs bellow, accompanied by his heavy footsteps as he left the bedroom.
 Some lights came on and I froze as I saw him coming downstairs and heading right for me. I backed into a corner by the water-cooler and stared at him in fear as he bent down and picked up the lighter.

He then turned towards me and yelled, "Midnight, you stupid cat! It's three in the morning! Go to sleep and stay off the damned counters!"

Copyright C 2009 by Claude Bouchard

You can contact Claude on his Twitter account: @ceebee308 and his author page on Facebook is :



Dogs Come when Called

"Dogs come when called. Cats take a message and get back to you."

"Of course, every cat is really the most beautiful woman in the room."

Edward Verrall Luca (essayist)

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