I am thinking of asking Maid to stand in the naughty corner for half an hour. She had been on ‘human catnip’ called champagne which makes her do daft things. She picked me up as I graciously allowed her to cuddle me.

She then blew a raspberry on my tummy and giggled as she told me I was filling out nicely, and then to add insult, she asked if I was having kittens. Kittens?! Me?! I’m a career Diva, where on earth do I find time for kittens? I barely have time for myself and don’t even know how you make kittens, although I understand Tom cats are involved in some way. If that’s true then no thank you. The motley male moggies that trundle through the gardens here at Tom Cat Towers are simply not in my class! Besides, I don’t want to ruin my figure, kittens indeed! Tubby tummy, that’s what she said, although Maid then tried to dig her way out of the hole by saying that the slight weight gain suited me.

Maid then did that funny thing she does every night and immersed herself in hot water in the Bliss Spa area where I allow her to groom my tummy and pantaloons. She put some green liquid stuff in her bath which smelt quite bizarre, almost medical. It was very pungent and made my nose itch. Whatever it was it cleared my nasal passages and I could breathe a lot better. When she got out of the tub I rubbed myself round her damp legs and the smell from the hot water transferred onto my fur. I’m not sure I like it, it smells of old trees.

It made me sneeze quite violently resulting in droplets of green snot all over the radiator which Maid rushed to clean off with tissues before giving me a good groom. I assisted by lying on my back, and lifting each arm so that she could do my armpits and pantaloons, then back to the duvet for an industrial snoozle, quite worn out.

Maid’s version!

Dumpty is looking really good. She has put on a little of the weight which she needed. We had a cuddle, something I never thought would happen when we first had her as she was such a skittish kitty and would struggle out of my arms and hide under the sideboard in the lounge, worried blue eyes peeping out at me.  Hugs are always at Madam’s pace and when she has had enough she’ll let out a little ‘mew’ of irritation and slither out of my arms in a huff.

It would have been lovely to have had her as a kitten, and then she wouldn’t have the issues she has now. I’m starting a cold so put some oil of Cedrex in my bath. Dumpty came in the bathroom and it seemed to do her good. She always has a bunged up nose and sneezes a lot so we both reaped the medicinal benefits!


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