Dumpty’s royal collection of blackbirds is getting bigger. I think the word has got out through all the trees that the catering at Tom Cat Towers is just top notch and brilliant for birds if you don’t mind an old grey furry flea bag to gaze adoringly at you.

Dumpty inspects her pet blackbirdIn the morning there are great clumps of them sitting in the Leylandii and on the bean poles on the patio making a heck of a racket demanding to be fed.  They all sit waiting for the human to open the French window and start lobbing huge handfuls of cat kibbles and raisins onto a brick by the window. The brick is there to raise the birds from slab level to the level of the carpet when her regal snootiness is sitting watching them. The window is left open and they seem to take turns in swooping down to Hoover up the kibbles whilst her royal dumbness sits but a few inches away just looking and sniffing.

The blackbirds at Tom Cat Towers are getting fatter and fatter. In fact some of them are just plain obese. It's a miracle some of them can fly!

They don’t seem to mind Dumpty, in fact they seem to adore her as she sits and supervises them. I don’t think Princess Posh Pants realiseswhat birds are for. She’s just a complete air head!

Wills and I know what birds are for, but the human is very strict in not letting us near Dumpty’s personal collection. They are obviously her toys and not for sharing.

I know Wills would love to sink his fangs into one, then separate fur from feather, I’ve seen him stalk them now and again. But they are too quick for the old lard bag as they flutter up into the hedge - laughing. But if I was him I wouldn’t risk the wrath of the human if she caught him with one in his chops.

Dumpty with her pet blackbirdThe human will transport Dumpty from the bed and place her by the window for her day’s entertainment. Sometimes she will put her outside if the sun is shining. Dumpty hates being outside, she doesn’t ‘do’ outside. She will slither into the old plastic pod on the patio and watch the birds as they come and eat kibbles off the brick right in front of her.

Sometimes she sits on the patio and some of the blackbirds get close enough for Dumpty to lower the royal snubbed nose and sniff them. They just do not seem to mind. What is wrong with these blackbirds?!

Dumpty receives a visitorDumpty would rather be inside on the comfort of carpet watching them, and they are getting very cheeky. One or two bold ones have actually been coming inside and hopping up and down on the carpet by Dumpty, who doesn’t even twitch a whisker. She’s just fascinated by them. They even bring their baby birds to see her!

I imagine the birds are pretty fascinated by a cat who doesn’t want to eat them!

There is one blackbird which sits on the garage roof waiting for the human to open the kitchen door first thing in the morning, he then flies in and helps himself to the cat food from the feeding station. The human thinks it’s cute. I just can’t believe that Will’s, the useless ginger Nelly, lets him steal our food!

Willi’s version

The grey floozy pants is allowed to have her own pet blackbirds. I am under strict instruction not to eat them!!

They drive me daft; they eat cat kibbles from a brick by the window, but if I stuff my snout in the kibbles for a gorge, I’m shoed away. They come into the house and parade up and down the carpet. There is one which actually comes into the kitchen in the morning and eats my food. I sit and watch it as I know I’m not allowed any where near it.

It’s hard for a  serial killer cat like myself not to spring out and snaffle one, but it’s not worth the human going on and on about if after as I sit surrounded by a pool of black feathers. Been there too often as a kitten!

Collecting blackbirds to just look at is not natural behaviour for a cat. Someone needs a serious word with bimbo brain!

A Cats Prayer

Lead me down all the right paths,
Keep me from fleas, bees, and baths.
Let me in should it storm,
Keep me safe, fed, and warm.

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