A DIETER’S BEST FRIEND IS HER CAT

Arrange your lunch in pleasing style

While you are struggling with your diet,

So with artistic skills not known before,

I decided I would try it.

I placed some tuna in the centre

Of a daintily patterned plate,

Surrounded by a humble salad,

To enjoy this, I could hardly wait.

I stood back in admiration,

Well, more in silent awe;

But before I could begin my feast

There came a knocking at the door.

I went off, and chatted long, although

I should have come back sooner,

For when I did, my plate was bare,

And gone was all the tuna.

My cat had thought his ship come in

When he chanced upon this treasure,

And not having tasted fish before,

It added to his pleasure.

Licking his lips, and washing his face,

Cleaning each whisker one by one,  

I looked forlornly at my plate and,

All at once, my appetite was gone.

The moral of this sorry tale

Is that cats are sensible and wise;

For what they eat on your behalf

Ensures you will always have thin thighs.

Pauline Dewberry

Published in ‘The Cat got the Cream’ 1997

A fitting tribute to Biggles who died in May, 1997

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