Pauline's Blog

On June 7^th, 2006, I was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukaemia and told that on 19^th June, I’d have to go into hospital for 6 months aggressive, intensive chemotherapy. This was not news that I expected to hear.

I had 6 cats to sort out, a major decluttering programme to deal with within 12 days, and tell various family members and friends about this staggering news. I also had no idea what kind of clothes to take into hospital with me for an impending 6-month stay.

I tried to think of it as if I was going on a ‘round the world’ cruise and work out the type of clothes I’d need for that. Aside for needing a ‘posh’ frock to wear at the captain’s table, I just opted for casual pyjama ‘bottoms’ and big baggy tee-shirts. They needed to be baggy because it would be necessary to be able to access the Hickman line at all times so tight fitting tops were out of the question.

So while I busied around on what was to be the hottest June on record, I noticed a gradual decline in my cat, Garfield. At 20 years and 3 months old, he had been with me through all sorts of health issues, relationship break ups, new jobs, and so on – and now, I saw that my dearest friend in all the world was telling me it was time for him to move on.

I spent the day with him, holding him and telling him how much I loved him, and would always love him. Our final trip to the vet was a sombre affair and Kevin, our wonderful vet, took one look at Garfield in his carrying basket and shook his head. It’s time, he said sadly.

I held Garfield in my arms while Melanie, a vet nurse, spoke quietly to him, and none of us took any notice of what Kevin was doing. I leaned down low over Garfield’s face and told him again what a good boy he was and how much I loved him. Then he did an extraordinary thing: he leaned up a little bit and licked my face – he did this as his way of kissing me – and then he was gone.

It was said by some that he knew what I faced ahead of me and knew that I couldn’t cope with all his needs plus those of my own, and that he’d ‘checked out’ to make life easier for me. As cats are so wise – and Garfield was a very sage cat – that is a possibility, but my heart ached for the one companion who had been with me through thick and thin for more than 20 years.      

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